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- HUMOR.FILTERED (2:5020/664) -------------------------------- HUMOR.FILTERED -
Msg : 294 of 360
From : Leo V. Mironoff 2:5020/293 21 Apr 02 19:47:04
To : All 22 Apr 02 02:42:25
Subj : 4hf
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Area : .4HF
From : Irene Solovjoff (2:5020/69.168), Sun Apr 21 2002 01:46
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EXCERPTS FROM A DOG'S DIARY

Day 180

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day 181

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day 182

8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!

10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!

11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

1:00 pm - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!

1:30 pm - OOOOOOOH. BATH. BUMMER!

4:00 pm - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!

5:00 pm - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!

5:30 pm - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!


EXCERPTS FROM A CAT'S DIARY

DAY 180

My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling
objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to
eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of
escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional
piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

DAY 181

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet
while they were walking almost succeeded. Must try this at the top
of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile
oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite
chair ... must try this on their bed.

DAY 182

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in
attempt to make them aware of what I am capable, and to try to
strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended
about what a good little cat I was Hmmm. Not working according to
plan.

DAY 183

I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe
snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy
to return. He is, obviously, a half-wit. The bird, on the other
hand, has to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am
certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal
room, his safety is assured.

But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.......


--- GoldED 2.51.A1026+

--- Dixi.
* Origin: Просьба отправлять на фильтрацию с сабджем 4hf. Спасибо (2:5020/293)